Mindset affects everything in life, and where relationships are concerned compatibility comes largely from mindset. So whether someone can find the right partner, then develop a successful relationship, largely comes down to their mindset, along with that of their partner.

How you think influences how you do things, your potential results with the things you do, how you communicate, plus how you perceive others and how they communicate with you.

It is relatively common for one partner to complain that their partner never says “I love you.” Even though their partner does tell them, daily. Their mindset, with with the presence of certain limiting beliefs, can cause them to never notice things, even when they are in progress.

Equally well, many looking for their perfect life partner for years never find anyone, even though there are various possible matches close by. All because of limiting beliefs within their mindset.

Mindset is core to every result achieved.

A person can be plagued by unhappiness, and negative results, throughout their life. All due to what they believe, and things happening deep within their mind that they are unconscious of.

Equally well, when someone has the right mindset, even if it was previously problematic, they can find their perfect partner instantly. Then go on to build a successful relationship, with a blissful marriage, and everything they dreamed of. All with relative ease. It just requires change to optimize and bring about that right mindset for them.

Mindset Is Core To Both Finding Your Perfect Partner And Building A Successful Relationship

What Is Mindset?

Mindset is the cumulative grouping of how you think on both a conscious and unconscious level.

Mindset is comprised of:

  • Core Values
  • Beliefs
  • Thoughts
  • Experiences
  • Ideas

This may seem like a short list, there is great depth to all these things, with some being firmly in the unconscious mind, others in the conscious mind, and some within both depending on their complexity and time since conception.

Every mindset is unique, even those who went to the same classes, and were brought up by the same parents, can have variations with how they think, and what’s important to them.

Accepting The Infinite Variation In Mindset While Working With Two Core Types

One key point around mindsets was the groupings postulated by Carol Dweck in what was labelled new psychology, whereby she divided every mindset between either fixed or growth, with some overall indicators that give a generalized breakdown of the types.

Note carefully, those two mindset groupings are in many ways limited in their reality. The groupings deal largely in absolutes, with most people varying between the extremes, often encapsulating both in different situations. They may be very fixed at home or with social events, yet have a growth type in terms of work and study. Equally well, it can be that a person believes they are a certain way, when something else is the reality, observation over time from key researchers brought about the understanding of sub type mindsets including the false growth mindset, plus truer growth mindset.

The point being, these concepts of fixed mindset and growth mindset should be used loosely. There’s a myriad of variation within people’s mindsets, an infinite level of variation. Having spent over two decades doing coaching a reasonable amount of that variation has been seen, along with the effects that variation has on people.

So while understanding the two core mindset types of fixed and growth is good, take them only as a rough guide, and never as an absolute. The general concepts can help you hone in on improving your relationships, or choosing the right life partner, there will be things you and your partner need to calibrate on with each other though. Or, potentially with help from relationship coaching if needed.

Growth Mindsets And Fixed Mindsets How They Affect Relationships

Mindsets do affect relationships, in part because self esteem and self love stem from the core of the mind, and how a person thinks. Additionally, there is the way two sets of thinking interact when people are dating.

When people value different things, it will place strain on the relationship. When they think in the same way, wanting the same things, and actively enjoying the same activities together, that when successful relationships are possible.

Growth Mindsets

Generally, people with growth mindsets embrace change. They are open to doing things in different ways in order to get better results. What’s more, they actively believe that they can improve, they just have to put their mind to it, take action, study if necessary, and things can be better.

Fixed Mindsets

Overall, people with fixed mindsets believe they are incapable of change. They are certain that things are set in stone, with their abilities determined at birth. As such, however good they are at something, is fixed, never changing. They believe that studying something will do nothing to improve their ability, neither will practice.

What This Means For Relationships

People with fixed mindsets are OK, as long as their partner has exactly the same way of thinking as them. Zero deviation.

Growth mindset partners can function with a partner who has a fixed mindset, it is however beset with challenge. It can drive both crazy for different reasons. The fixed mindset partner thinking the growth minded partner wants them to change, or that they think they’re stupid, or rude. With the growth minded partner thinking the fixed one is putting blocks on the relationship, holding things back from being as good as they could be.

Fixed partners can show narcissistic tendencies at times, or even be straight up narcissistic. Wanting everyone to change for them, and believing they are better then everyone else. Something which comes from them choosing to ignore their own flaws, and instead shift the perception so that everyone else is at fault. Which can lead to very toxic relationships.

Relationships between two growth minded partners can be extremely good, provided they work together, and accept feedback from each other. Growth – Growth mindset relationships generally have the best chance of being healthy and successful.

What Creates Successful Relationships?

Successful relationships come from partners who share the same vision for life together, and think in the same way.

While this is the ideal, couples can create successful, healthy relationships by choosing to work together. By creating healthy boundaries, and ensuring they have good communication, learning new techniques such as neuro linguistic programming to help them communicate more effectively as needed.

Things can very easily seem good on when couples first meet.

That initial passion and attraction, combined with a small understanding of shared interests, causing each person to extrapolate out about the things they’re unaware of. Their minds fill in gaps, choosing to believe certain things about their potential life partner, based on how their own mindset operates, and believes likely to be true.

Within a long term relationship everything comes out over time.

Successful Couples Work Together Evolving As Their Relationship Evolves

People change over time. New information also comes out about people as you spend more time with them.

This can be as simple as being in a new situation, and discovering how your partner actually reacts. It can also be that things you had never talked about, often regarding the past, come to light. Sometimes this new knowledge can reinforce the relationship, making it stronger. Other times it can hit like a hammer blow out of the blue, leaving you wondering if you truly know your partner.

Fully knowing a person is in many ways impossible.

Everyone has a lifetime’s worth of experience and learning. Something that would be impractical to talk through, or communicate in any other way short of having telepathic access to their mind.

Team Work Builds Successful Relationships

So, successful couples work together as a team. They tend to work hard on building better communication, and strengthening things for the long run.

When expectations fall short, they work together to overcome, making a commitment to get on track together. Then continue pushing forward into the future with love and respect for each other. Forgiveness is important, within the limits of healthy boundaries of course.

This way of working together as a team is what causes successful couples to succeed with their relationship, and everything else they do in life. It takes effort, with that effort being seen as well worthwhile, because the love and returns from that effort bring such joy and happiness.

When partners stayed focused on being positive with each other, communicating, being loving, respectful, compassionate, sharing their desires and building on their dreams together. Working through life’s various challenges together, as partners. Plus accept that change is inevitable, and to be embraced and worked through together. Then they can build a truly successful relationship filled with love, for the long run.

How Mindset Affects Ability To Find The Right Partner

Self esteem and self love are core to how easily people find their ideal partner, or even any date at all.

Dating mindset is important when doing partner searching, though overall mindset, including how you think about work, family, home, health, and everything else, has an effect too.

Limiting Beliefs, Limiting Decisions And Negative Results

Regardless of what fun activities you plan, or how much quality time and eye contact you have with your date, when you have limiting beliefs things are unlikely to end well.

A limiting belief can be as simple as “Nobody loves me” or “I am not worth loving” or “I never find the right partner.” One thing that is often heard is people saying things along the lines of “I’ll never find mister right” or miss right for that matter. These all come from deep within the unconscious mind, sometimes people are unaware of them, and it is those who have a certain focus along with awareness of linguistic markers, that pick up on them.

When people have limiting beliefs, especially like the ones above, then while they may never realize it, they are blocking themselves from finding someone they can build a loving, healthy relationship with.

Dealing with limiting belief structures is essential for stable, lasting happiness and love to be possible.

Core Values And Expectations For Dream Relationships

Core values reside in the deepest depths of mindset. Values are in the heart of the unconscious mindset, and are what create the upfront motivation and inspiration for everything they govern.

You have values for everything, grouped into things such as relationships, health, work and career, family, travel, and so on.

One big issue is that unless you go through a detailed values elicitation process, then you will never understand what your actual values are. Organizations and people often make statements about their values, though from a coaching perspective, and having done this work with a lot of people, what people think and believe consciously, and what is there in reality on an unconscious level, can be very different things.

For dreams to come to become reality, your values have to be properly aligned with them.

Much as with limiting belief structures, issues with core values need to be dealt with so that your ideal life partner can come into your life, and so that you can build a healthy relationship with them. Unless things are cleaned up, plus properly aligned, limitation will be experienced, and challenges apparent on a ongoing basis.

When it comes to mindset, core values play the most significant role possible, for everything you do, and everything you wish to do or be.

Action For Optimizing Your Mindset To Find Your Ideal Partner

To optimize your mindset so you can find your ideal partner easily, then build a loving relationship which lasts long term, you have to spend time in personal development or having specialist mindset coaching.

Whatever your hope or desire when it comes to your perfect life partner, whatever you expect on a conscious level, you have to have the psychological strategy running effectively in the background for those things to come into reality.

Working through meditations, especially mindfulness meditation paired with visualization meditation, can be effective in creating mindset change. This approach does take time though, a lot of time. Getting good with meditation takes focus, and practice. It rarely achieves overnight results, often taking many years to bring about the skill that yields desired results.

Therapy can be good, counselling can open up new veins of thought to explore, yet often results are slow due to the passive nature of many therapies, especially counselling.

Coaching usually provides the fastest, most dependable results. Especially mindset coaching done using neuro linguistic programming techniques (NLP) backed up with Time-Line Therapy.

Coaching provides a very active way of working with mindset, with neuro linguistic programming giving the tools to dig in deep and finding the points of limiting decisions and values issues causing challenges. From there, Time-Line Therapy gives a rapid method for release of negative emotions, and then the limiting decisions which have been causing problems. As a by product, as the negativity departs, core values rearrange themselves, becoming more supportive of goals and dreams. Provided specialist work is then done to support future dreams and plans, then core values and new belief structures come into place which make those dreams and plans virtually certain to succeed.

This type of mindset change is life changing for those who embrace it, removing causes of conflict and bringing a sense of certainty to the future, along with a calm sense of confidence that helps manifest desired results. It’s especially helpful with empowering your ability to find your ideal partner, and live in a happy, harmonious relationship with them. As such coaching is advisable for anyone moving on from a relationship, plus for anyone seriously preparing for a relationship when they want to get married. Equally well, it can be especially valuable for anyone scared of falling in love.

When your mindset is properly optimized, finding the love of your life becomes easy.

What Affects Mindset And Your Ability To Have A Healthy Relationship?

Your connection with the world, and how you choose to think, is what affects your mindset and your ability to have a successful relationship.

The greatest influence on mindset comes from parents and teachers, especially in early years. During that time from birth through to around 7 years of age, most children are like sponges, walking unconscious minds just absorbing every stimulus, and reacting based on feedback they get from others around them when they’re unsure what to think or do for themselves.

That conditioning generally stays throughout life, except in extraordinary circumstances.

Of course, there is a process of evolution. As different situations happen, new thinking can develop, subtly modifying an existing mindset, or causing a transition to entirely new one.

How Relationships Affect Mindset

Growth Mindsets Create Successful Relationships Relatively Easily

As people spend more time together, and provided they’re attracted to each other, they generally build more rapport, and grow to love each other more as a result.

When there is enough rapport, people will do anything for each other. Literally anything.

So as couples discover more about each other, it can cause partners to change. They can want to be more a certain type of person, in order to make their partner happier, and improve their enjoyment of being together.

For some, this can be a natural, loving thing. For others who are more manipulative, it can cause a situation where they lead their partner on a certain path, in order to achieve a more one sided result.

How Relationships Affect People With A Fixed Mindset

As mentioned in the section about fixed mindsets, those who have a fixed way of thinking are generally incapable of change, and resist it greatly as a result too.

This leads to a situation where if someone with a fixed mindset is with a partner who moves things around, or changes things regularly, they can become very stressed. When you push the boundaries of a fixed mindset to the extremes you find conditions like obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). Two associated issues which are impacted by relationships being doubting and having a hard time dealing with uncertainty, and needing things to be orderly and balanced.

Unless a balance can be found, which is agreeable to the person with a fixed mindset, then being together will become very stressful, for both people.

With two partners that have a fixed mindset, if there is variation on that mindset, then they will inevitably breakup due to incompatibility.

If however, two people with an identical fixed mindset come together, both insisting on doing things in the same way, and keeping to the same routine, going to the same places, plus being unified in their direction in life, then a successful relationship can develop. What’s more, it can be incredibly fulfilling as the level of unity is so great. It does however require virtually carbon copies of that mindset in order to be possible.

How Relationships Affect People With A Growth Mindset

One key factor for those with growth mindsets is that of personal growth, generally they are open to it and embrace it. As such, they bring flexibility and huge opportunity for behavior that brings about fulfillment within their relationships.

Growth mindsets are often more open to dealing with things in a fair way, and will often find fun activities that bring harmony as both partners can enjoy them together. Change to be expected as time progresses, those with a growth mindset accept this, and work with life’s variations in a spirit of evolving into a more successful couple together.

When things become challenging, they will persevere as best they can in an effort to improve things, and bring happiness. In that mindset change is a certainty over time, especially with changes in circumstances such as career changes, relocations, children, and more, this way of being can be very valuable for those wanting to have a success with their long term relationship.

Growth mindset partners may never see eye to eye on everything, when they don’t they find a way through. Often just respecting each others perspective, and finding another way to bring harmony. When growth mindset partners do share common values and goals, then they can be extremely happy together long term.

How To Build A Healthy Growth Mindset And A Successful Relationship

Positive Mindset Is Core To The Strategy For Relationship Success

To create success with any relationship, you need the resources on a psychological level so create that success. You need a positive mindset.

Every relationship is different, so the focus must always be on how you can adapt in order for love and happiness to be possible. Hence why cultivating a healthy growth mindset is important.

Using affirmations can help influence positive behavior, while encouraging perseverance through challenges. They require constant use over a long period of time to be mildly effective though.

Meditation can be incredibly good, especially mindfulness meditation, as it brings an acceptance of change, along with an emotional detachment from negativity. Resources like this, when you work hard on developing them, greatly empower how you can thrive within a relationship with the right partner.

What’s generally challenging for people to deal with, and thus creates the greatest challenge to happiness, are limiting belief structures. They’re buried deep within the mindset, and need very careful, precise resources to deal with them effectively.

The best way to influence positive mindset change, fostering that growth mindset free from limitation and negativity, is through specialist mindset coaching. There are various businesses that offer these services, it does require careful discernment to find one that can do the work effectively, so that you can get the result you desire. Do careful research to find a good neuro linguistic programming trained coach, master practitioner level or better, who is also certified in Time-Line Therapy, so that they can help you optimize your mindset for how you wish to be. Online Coaching Coach specializes in this type of work, and has a strong reputation for the mindset change they help clients achieve.

Cultivating the right mindset, which has you embrace and adapt with change, empowers you to build successful relationships with relative ease. By utilizing resources including mindfulness meditation and mindset coaching, you can ensure that success is yours when you find the right partner, and true love comes.

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