How to get someone to like you? Developing rapport, and building romantic love on top, takes a lot of focus, energy, and a reasonable understanding of psychology if you really want to manage things to a desired outcome.

Building rapport can be done in a variety of ways, from building a steady understanding of that person’s likes, spending time with them and getting eye contact, through to much deeper things which work directly with the unconscious mind to create trust rapidly.

While building rapport and gaining trust can be easy, you have to judge very carefully, and ethically, as to whether what you are doing is a good thing for everyone. Certainly, when someone is already in a relationship, attempting to get them to fall in love with you would be hugely unethical. Even when someone is single, a degree of thought is required to ensure you are pursuing something which will create benefit to all.

Building love, and getting someone to like you is usually best done organically.

When you need a little boost, to help with confidence, or put someone at ease about dating you, and perhaps considering marriage, then following this advice is good. Do make sure you are using this when you are serious about your potential partner though. Then develop the relationship while showing the real you the whole time, keeping healthy boundaries, and ensuring it is a healthy relationship filled with true love.

Getting Someone To Like You And Build A Loving Relationship Filled With Romantic Love Is A Deeply Psychological Process

How To Get Someone To Like You Psychology

Two People Can Come A Long Way With Trust Using Non Verbal Methods

When you want someone to like you, you have to spend time with them, and do so in a way that they enjoy.

Lots of relationships fall apart as they either become one sided, or already were from the beginning. As much as you may want to change someone, make them ‘better’ or ‘more rounded’ that is hugely unethical. You cannot change people, and attempting to do so does bring unfavorable results, for everyone. It is far better to change yourself, than start getting someone to like you who you are fundamentally incompatible with.

The only times you should be getting someone to like you, are:

  • When you want a chance to start getting to know them
  • When you know you are truly compatible

If you are unsure what is involved with true compatibility, go through the article about how to choose a life partner, and pay careful attention to the sections on shared values, communication, and mutual respect, they are very important.

When you know you have good compatibility, and you are certain about becoming serious about the person you wish to like you, then start using the following advice.

How To Get Someone To Like You Without Talking To Them

You can develop rapport very easily, and very quickly, with someone without even speaking a word.

Neuro linguistic programming is very good for improving communication, there are also useful techniques, which are well proven ways, for building rapport on an unconscious level within the set of techniques you can learn from it.

Matching and mirroring are very simple techniques that involve physiology, i.e. body language and facial expressions.

For matching, you take on the same posture as the person you wish to build rapport with. If their left leg is crossed over their right while seated, you do the same thing.

With mirroring, you are doing exactly that, creating a mirror image of their body language with your own body, making it akin to them looking in a mirror when they see your physiology.

Matching a person’s breathing rate can be challenging, it does send incredibly strong signals on an unconscious level though. When you have matched breathing, their is an immediate belief created within the other person’s mindset that the two of you are alike, and thus you can be trusted. This is very powerful.

If possible, practice with friends to hone your ability with these things before doing anything with someone you like. When people are to overt, or over zealous, it comes across badly and will break rapport.

How To Get Someone To Like You Through Text

When you are going completely through text you need to pay close attention to your partner’s use of words and expressions, and start using them yourself.

Within neuro linguistic programming there are things called predicates, words that signify whether a person has a preference for:

  • Visual – how things look
  • Audio – how things sound
  • Audio digital – self talk and words
  • Kinesthetic – how things feel

You are looking for things along the lines of “Do you see what I mean?” or “That sounds great.” These things will give you an indication of their personal style and preferences, enabling you to serve your words in the right way for them to understand easily, thus making the text more enjoyable for them.

While romantic texts can be great, only some people enjoy that kind of thing. You need to calibrate on that person, and discover what appeals to them. This is a very iterative approach, and subtle changes are wisest, otherwise you risk breaking rapport with them and having to start from scratch.

How To Make Someone To Like You?

Proven Ways To Make Friends Make People Laugh And Feel Comfortable

In short, you can never make someone like you, you can only create a positive influence that encourages them to like you.

This crosses into the territory of changing other people, something you should never even attempt to do. Instead, change yourself in a way that you are happy with, such that your personalities become similar in a way that’s pleasing to them. While doing this you can still use the various rapport building techniques shared here.

Dale Carnegie’s Advice On How To Win Friends And Influence People

A very good book which is one of the origins of the self help movement is “How to Win Friends & Influence People” by Dale Carnegie which was originally published in October 1936.

The Rules For How To Make People Like You
  1. Don’t Criticize, Condemn Or Complain
  2. Give Honest, Sincere, Appreciation
  3. Arouse In The Other Person An Eager Want
  4. Become Genuinely Interested In Other People
  5. Smile
  6. Remember That A Person’s Name Is To That Person The Sweetest And Most Important Sound In Any Language
  7. Be A Good Listener. Encourage Others To Talk About Themselves
  8. Talk In Terms Of The Other Person’s Interests
  9. Make The Other Person Feel Important – And Do It Sincerely
  10. The Only Way To Get The Best Of An Argument Is To Avoid It
  11. Show Respect For The Other Person’s Opinion. Never Say, “You’re Wrong.”
  12. If You Are Wrong Admit It Quickly And Emphatically
  13. Begin In A Friendly Manner
  14. Get The Other Person Saying “Yes, Yes”
  15. Let The Other Person Do A Great Deal Of The Talking
  16. Let The Other Person Feel That The Idea Is His Or Hers
  17. Try Honestly To See Things From The Other Person’s Point Of View
  18. Be Sympathetic With The Other Person’s Ideas And Desires
  19. Appeal To The Nobler Motives
  20. Dramatize Your Ideas
  21. Throw Down A Challenge
  22. Begin With Praise And Honest Appreciation
  23. Call Attention To People’s Mistakes Indirectly
  24. Talk About Your Own Mistakes Before Criticizing The Other Person
  25. Ask Questions Instead Of Giving Direct Orders
  26. Let The Other Person Save Face
  27. Praise The Slightest Improvement And Praise Every Improvement. Be “Hearty In Your Approbation And Lavish In Your Praise”.
  28. Give The Other Person A Fine Reputation To Live Up To
  29. Use Encouragement. Make The Fault Seem Easy To Correct
  30. Make The Other Person Happy About Doing The Thing You Suggest

Starting to do some of these things will really help make people like you. You can do some, or all of them, benefit can still come. Consistently checked over many years, research suggests these points shared by Dale Carnegie really do make people like, become friends, even best friends or love interests, with those utilizing some are all of the 30 points.

How Do I Get Someone To Really Like Me?

Smile Showing Pearly Whites And Happy Facial Expressions Example

Shifts in mindset, taking on new interests, while using those non-verbal rapport building techniques, can massively improve how someone else thinks of you.

The core basis of how to choose the right life partner are related to core values and beliefs, good communication, and mutual trust. Shared interests and pastimes form a very solid way for two people to become close, and increase their affinity by doing something they enjoy together.

So when you create mindset change of your own free will, to become more like the person you wish to be with, you are creating greater opportunity for closeness mentally and emotionally.

When you want to build a deep relationship, build commonality and room for togetherness. When you need to do something in order to create the opportunity for that to happen, focus on matching, mirroring and getting in sync with your breathing, paying close attention to their predicates, words and phrases, so you can communicate with them in the way they prefer to communicate. Doing this can produce incredibly deep results in a very short period of time, mere minutes.

How To Get Someone To Like You Romantically

Most People Want To See The Real You Before Becoming A Love Interest

Self confidence is incredibly important when it comes to love and attraction. It stems from self love and self esteem, which are affected by limiting decisions and the beliefs that come from them. So cleaning up your mindset, learning to love yourself, developing healthy self esteem and thus self confidence, is vital for attracting romantic interest. Getting quality coaching with coach skilled in neuro linguistic programming and Time-Line Therapy is the fastest way to clean up a mindset and become confident in a healthy way.

Dealing With Limiting Beliefs Is Key To Success In Love

Getting coaching, mindset coaching or NLP life coaching, is one of the best ways of dealing with self love and self esteem issues. Use of techniques from neuro linguistic programming and Time-Line Therapy, by a highly skilled coach, can clear up a lifetime’s worth of issues in a matter of a few hours.

Beyond coaching, sorting yourself out physically greatly helps with self esteem, and the level to which others will find you attractive. Proper hygiene is very simple yet important way to influence people’s thoughts about you. Especially as good hygiene will help them feel comfortable around you, rather than being distracted by off putting odours.

Even if you are very good looking, can hold riveting conversations across numerous interesting topics, or make people laugh, poor hygiene and presentability can be a serious deal breaker or block for most people.

How Do You Get Your Crush To Like You?

Never Be Afraid To Show Your Real Self And Share Personal Thoughts

Not everyone is going to be attracted to you. Some just have a very different type that they are looking for.

That said, when there is potential with a crush, when you have worked out the kind of things they like, and know there is common ground there, then there’s plenty that you can do. It can be best to start off working towards being a friend, before you work on progressing things further, allow them time to get to know and appreciate you.

At Marriage Matching we operate an introductions service that works to the traditional Japanese Omiai system. The reason I mention this is because when Omiai are done online they are only 45 minutes, and in person they are around 60 to 90 minutes. Not so long when it is your only first chance, and if it does not go well you will never see that potential match again. Yet plenty of clients, after a little coaching, do get the rapport building right.

When you have longer, and more opportunities, at school or university especially, it can be relatively easy to build up rapport and trust with a crush. Doing so in little bits here and there. Just saying “hi” and smiling, so they start paying attention to you more, makes an impact. Doing things to help them brings in a few brownie points which help build trust too, and with it, affection. This is possible in the workplace too, though it has to be judged a lot more carefully.

Plus of course, using the unconscious methods of getting someone to like you without talking to them in an effective way.

How Do You Make Your Crush Fall In Love With You?

You can never make someone fall in love with you, you can however create the conditions that allow them to naturally choose to fall in love with you. The best you can do is influence the situation and their feelings for you.

People feel love when their internal ideal partner checklist is suitably filled. It may only require partial filling, it may require a very complex set of affirmations. In reality you will never know until it happens.

That said, once you have built enough rapport for a crush to like you, take it to the point where love can develop is relatively easy.

Compatibility Is Core To Feeling Love

Talk To A New Friend About Their Interesting Topics Deepens Rapport

The transition from like to love is all about the level to which they feel special, and the level to which you engage them psychologically, spiritually, and physically. Naturally, these things will vary from person to person, according to cultural backgrounds, personal experiences, and preferences. To a certain extent you have to calibrate on them, and take it from there in terms of knowing what’s important to them.

Asking follow up questions, whether in small talk on a first date, or as part of deeper conversations as a new friend, or in any other situation, is an excellent way agreed by relationship experts to show that you genuinely care about someone. It facilitates a deeper understanding of each other, which is the pathway to love.

Getting to know someone on a deeper level is the best way to demonstrate that you’re interested in them, while also helping to cultivate their interest in you. It helps you two bond in a healthy way which both can be confident in, while also providing a level of fun depending on the conversations being had.

Every moment of getting to know your crush more deeply, creates opportunity for them to see you in a new light, which is how feelings of love often get ignited.

How To Make Your Crush Fall In Love With You Fast

When you want someone you have a crush on to fall in love with you fast you have to effectively become their entire world focus for a period of time.

The Importance Of Being Their Type

Knowing you are their type, or that you can influence them enough on a psychological level so that you become their type is core to this. If you are not their type, it will take longer, potentially never happening. When you are their type, then things can quickly align. There is zero scope for alternate viewpoints on this.

Becoming Their World
Research Suggests Eye Contact And Paying Attention Are Vital For Love

Provided you have that set, you then need them to build the sense that they truly matter to you, and there’s no-one else they would rather be with. You have to spend as much time with them as possible, while giving them room to be one their own if they need it. It is a very fine balance, with too much time and over communication potentially breaking rapport due to their need to either decompress, or otherwise take a mental health break.

Essentially, you have to be there almost on demand, without giving them the impression they have complete control. When they need someone to turn to, you have to be their first choice. When they want to do something fun, you have to be their first choice. You must become the person they gravitate to for everything, building rapport is essential for this as it happens through trust and affinity.

Avoiding Controlling Behavior And Keeping Respect

When they know, or believe, they have total control, they can walk all over you, and they may well lose respect for you. Give them reason to believe that you are putting them first, above other things in your life, yet doing so within reason, and they will appreciate you more for it. Ergo, feelings of admiration and love can increase.

With every conversation you need to listen carefully, showing your understanding and support as needed. This goes beyond being an act, it is something you have to live and believe for yourself.

Never attempt to force the situation, it will only break rapport, and potentially have them moving a long way from you emotionally.

When you can become that person your crush wants to spend time with, the one they turn to when they need help and advice, then love can bloom. Provided of course that you are their type. You could well become best friends at first, from there it is all about adjust the lens through which they see you, and becoming a love focus, which is done through communication.

Building To A Long Term Relationship Effectively

Not Everyone Will Open Up And Mention Their Likes But Never Force Them

Most people struggle with building a healthy long term relationship because they lack compatibility.

While you can create a strong feeling with someone short term, and have a lot of fun together, with minimal compatibility, there are core issues which show up over time that lead to issues. Unless you have good enough communication, and the desire to change and evolve with each other.

Flexibility is vital for long run success with relationships, especially marriage.

People change, on a day by day basis in small ways, and in bigger ways with life changing events and certain milestones. The person you start dating in your 20s or 30s will likely be rather different when they’re in their 40s and beyond. Stress, changes with work, bereavements, economic shifts and changes to family structure will all create mindset shifts.

You have to work with your partner to adapt together through these things, provided you do love and want to be with them long term.

Finding The Right Partner

Everything with love, especially in the long run, hinges around compatibility.

Shared core values and beliefs, mutual respect, and good communication are just some of the things vital when choosing the right life partner, and equally vital when thinking “should I get married?

Most people struggle to find the right person to spend their life with due to the dating pool they are in, and often the lack of desire to change their dating pool. When you are in the right one, meeting someone whom you’re highly compatible with is relatively easy.

Getting Professional Help
Confidence Goes A Long Way With Being Liked So Get Help Building It

Doing things like getting help from professional matchmakers is one of the fastest ways to meet the right person. Granted, during matchmaking you may meet a few people who are not quite right, you are relying on your matchmaker to know both your and the potential partner’s mindsets inside out, along with all their hidden motivations and thoughts. Which can be challenging.

Introductions from a good matchmaking service or marriage agency definitely make it faster to find the right marriage partner though.

From there it is all about establishing rapport, growing trust, and creating the conditions need for love to flourish.

Building rapport through body language, eye contact, use of follow up questions, proper hygiene are fast ways to make people like you. To make someone love you, you must be confident around them, have a strong sense of shared compatibility, with an ability to wait for them as needed. Allowing things to progress naturally, even if with a little influence from you using no-verbal rapport building techniques. Follow these tips, getting them right, and you can get someone to like you with relative ease.

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